It’s a familiar story in the lives of men born in the early decades of the twentieth century. They were making their way in their chosen occupations or studies and then the War broke in and a whole new experience of life began. This is much in the national consciousness again with the forthcoming commemoration of VE Day. Nothing should prevent us being caught up in the joyful images of that day especially in these times in which we are living. We will inevitably find encouragement in the story of a people liberated from years of restriction and danger. It should not be forgotten, however, that the War left physical and mental scars in some men which they carried for the rest of their lives. Life after victory was still a struggle.
Alistair Urquart’s book The Forgotten Highlander tells his story of his capture by the Japanese in 1942 and the three years of living Hell as a slave working on the construction of the Burma Railway. It was an eighteen hour day punctuated by starvation, disease and torture. He returned to Scotland broken in mind, spirit and body. He suffered nightmares, claustrophobia, depression as well as a variety of physical problems. Despite finding a way forward with a good job and a happy family life he speaks in the last paragraph of his book of the ‘ghosts’ that remained with him. Speaking by nickname of the worst of the guards on the railway he writes:
‘The cruel faces of the Black Prince, Dr Death and the Mad Mongrel have stalked my dreams for more than six decades now. And in my thoughts and prayers I will never forget the faces of all those young men who died looking like old men, those prisoners who endured terrible deaths in a distant land.’
There cannot be much doubt that Paul carried physical and psychological scars throughout his life as an apostle and an evangelist. Scattered throughout his letters are references to his sufferings in a field of service he often likened to warfare. It was a spiritual battle but in its way just as demanding as the real thing. You can read about his experiences in some detail in 2 Corinthians 11: 16-30. Imprisonment, physical attack, varieties of torture, near death experiences from exposure, deprivation of sleep and food. These are just a few of the sufferings he had to endure. Any one of which could lead to what nowadays would be classified as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. And the question arises, how can you carry on under the accumulated weight of experiences like this?
Astonishingly Paul believed that all of his traumatic experiences fed into his work as an evangelist and made him more effective. It’s worth reading how he works this out in 2 Corinthians 4: 7-12. Speaking of the Gospel that had been revealed to him he says:
‘But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.’
The pressures he has experienced have stripped him of all his natural resources. But what is left is his reliance on the ‘all-surpassing power’ of God. It is in this power that he preached the Gospel that brought life to others.
Let’s be clear that this was not a psychological trick. We are all familiar with slogans like ‘No Pain No Gain’ and ‘What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Strong.’ There may be some truth in these at a physical or psychological level. But Paul is going deeper. He knew that winding up your natural resources of physical toughness and mental resilience was not the way forward for a Christian evangelist. In 2 Corinthians 4 he goes on to speak of his faith in the resurrection of Jesus. It is because of this and the power revealed in it that grace ‘is reaching more and more people’ through his ministry. In a way he is saying that his personal weakness is giving the Holy Spirit the opportunity to make his preaching effective and to bring more people to faith in Christ.
No one in their right mind would wish Paul’s experiences in their lives. But it is a comfort to know that when negativity breaks into our lives we are not diminished as disciples of Christ and may in fact be made more powerful in His Spirit.
