Do you remember Space Dust? You used to get it in the Penny Tray (that great repository of E numbers and promoter of tooth decay) in the sweetie shop. It was a bit like sherbet but when you sprinkled it on your tongue it sparked and fizzed. It comes to mind quite often at present. I feel as if someone has sprinkled Space Dust on my brain. It’s probably due to the new medication, the biggest drawback being my lack of concentration. When I am reading my mind seems to slide over the words without gaining much of a foot-hold. The result is that that sacred principle of finishing what I have started has had to be abandoned.
My Bible reading has been affected but I am too long in the tooth now to beat myself up about that. The thing to do is to cut back. Focus on a short passage, maybe even one verse, and pray that the Holy Spirit will work it into your inner being. A colleague was once in hospital and feeling very low. He opened up his heart to a trusted friend, especially the difficulty he had with prayer. ‘Don’t you think the Lord understands how you feel at present?’ was the response he received.
I’ve never forgotten that. Sometimes we need a nudge to open our Bibles or to create some space in the day for dedicated prayer. But when you are ill, low in energy, wayward in concentration, befuddled with medication, that’s when we need to bear in mind that our God is not a dark, threatening shadow looming over us but the Shepherd who makes us lie down in green pastures, leads us beside quiet waters and restores our souls.
